YAWN

"Why must I be cursed with such a horrible thing?" a young woman muttered to herself as she sat in front of her TV. It was two in the morning and she had to awaken early that day to take an important exam. Yet here she was, using the internet channel on her Nintendo Wii, typing out a sob story about her "curse" on a role-playing forum. The light in her bedroom was shut off; the bright glow of the television was the only thing that illuminated the untidy room.

"Her back ached in pain and her body longed for rest. Unfortunately, she was unable to fall asleep..."



This is a true story made with 100% fact.

Eh...Ok..I get it..

Good writing

Thanks. It's amazing what a lack of sleep can do to a person, huh?

Aurora wrote:

Thanks. It's amazing what a lack of sleep can do to a person, huh?

Yeah.And i got a rating for ye.


Oh and this also sounds like a spooky story..How you were like...Hypnotized to sit there in front of the Tv.

Anyways..It gets


9/10 in creativity

7/10 In story

10/10 In spookiness

My overall rating is:

8/10

Congratulations for writing such a good story.You should be proud of yourself(Not sarcastic)

Oh cool =)

Well whatever.I liked it. And so i give it a good rating.

PHAIL.

Seriously, what's the point of the story? it seems like you just put together a bunch of words.
I'm sorry, but it sucked.
0/10.

EDIT: Also, how the heck is this fact?

No foreshadowing, nothing interesting happens, had me tired.

Darkrai Koopa wrote:

Seriously, what's the point of the story?

No point really. I was just really really bored and really really tired at about 2 in the morning so I wrote it to pass the time.

Darkrai Koopa wrote:

Also, how the heck is this fact?

See above

Darkrai Koopa wrote:

PHAIL.

Seriously, what's the point of the story? it seems like you just put together a bunch of words.
I'm sorry, but it sucked.
0/10.

Well..Arent all stories put togheter by a bunch of words?Arent they?Anyways.Im not choosing sides here i just thought you could atleast show some Constructive critic.Not like thoose guys on Pixeltendo...Anyways..No offense but that post really made no sense at all.

I did give CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. I told him to put more thought and detail into his stories. She put together RANDOM words, stories are actual words put together. >_>

Dang, maybe it would have been better if I put video game characters &/or pop culture references in it! Just like Robot Chicken & Family Guy! LOLOLOL

Darkrai Koopa wrote:

She put together RANDOM words

No I didn't wut r u talkin bout

No words are random except for Lol and Rofl and Lmao and all the other weird words.

So you mean....Anyways..Better not say that.I dont want to start a flame war


All words are real words.Check the dictionary

Yuping wrote:

No words are random except for Lol and Rofl and Lmao and all the other weird words.

So you mean....Anyways..Better not say that.I dont want to start a flame war


All words are real words.Check the dictionary

*Headslap*

That's not what I meant.

It's a saying for "It makes no sense".

If you flipped through a dictionary it might make sense.

fyi

BUT SINCE SUM PPL R 2 LAZY TO LOOK UP A FEW WORDS HERE IS THE DUMBED DOWN PRETEEN FRIENDLY VERSION

"Gee I wish I could fall asleep I wonder why I cant" a closet furry complained to herself as she sat in front of her TV. It was two in the morning and she had to wake up early that day to take an important algebra exam at the local college because she is super smart & is only 16 & is in college before all of her idiot friends. But instead of sleeping she sat in her room, using the internet channel on her Nintendo Wii & writing a story about her situation that apparently does not make sense to SOME people. The light in her bedroom was shut off; the bright glow of the television screen was the only thing that lit up her untidy bedroom.

"Her back hurt & she was tired. Unfortunately, she was unable to fall asleep because all of the sudden MARIO & SONIC THE HEDGEHOG CRASHED INTO HER ROOM & THEY WERE HAVING AN EPIC BATTLE SO I WAS ALL LIKE "STOP FIGHTIG & GET OUT I'M TRYING TO SLEEP" & THEY WERE ALL LIKE "K" & THEY LEFT SO ONCE AGAIN THE DAY IS SAVED THANKS TO SOME STUPID FAT LOSER WHO WRITES STORIES THAT DO NOT MAKE SENSE THE END."

I think it makes a lot of sense.

Atleast thats what i think

I don't see what doesn't make sense either. I just couldn't fall asleep one night so I wrote about it. Why is that so hard to understand?

If you don't have anything good to write, don't write anything.

I'll write whatever I want. If people don't like it then tough.

Yes.I agree with Aurora.If she feels like writing then she should have the right to Write what she thinks about/Does without people coming in and saying mean stuff..

There's a difference between criticizing and saying meany stuff.

Meany stuff:
"Dude, you stink! HAHAHAHAHA! YOU SUCK!"

Criticism:
"Uh... I don't think there was really a point in that."

Criticism & "meany" stuff (lol) are the exact same thing.

Unless you were talking about CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, in which case neither of your examples provided any at all. In fact your first post in this thread offered no constructive critique & it were more of a poor trolling attempt than anything else.

"Seriosuly, what's the point of it?"

Hi.

That's constructive.

No, that's just asking what the point is.

Constructive would be something like...

"I didn't understand the story, so maybe you should try <insert suggestion here> so it's makes more sense."

Stop, Aurora, just stop. You're acting like one of those Club Penguin Treo n00bs who can't take criticism.

Oh, I take constructive criticism just fine. In fact I encourage it.

It's just a shame that you didn't give me any.