Conkula's Castle (Conker's Bad Fur Day)

Villager: We gotta stake him!!

Vampire Luigi: *to Count Batula* Guess we gotta clean the mess up.

Count Batula: Yes. And while you're at it, why don't you take care of those three fools at our door?

Vampire Luigi: Okie dokie. *turns into a bat and flies out.*

Bosco: Why are you foos stayin' here?! It's filled with ghosts, zombies, and anything else!!

*Bat Luigi hangs on the tree, and spotted Mario.*

Bat Luigi: *worried* Mario??

Bosco: AHH!! THE BAT TALKED!

Mario: Relax! Some bats don't talk... They're just squeal.

Bat Luigi: Squeak!

Mario: See?

Pac-Man: But.. I don't remember seeing bats squeak in an italian accent.

Mario: ...Nah.

Count Batula turns into his bat form and starts swooping down at villagers.

*The Villagers are screaming.*

Mario: What was that?!

Bosco: I told them there are those damn monsters, but they wouldn't listen. No more hidin' around! Get in the house and smack him down!!

Mario: Okie dokie! *Enters the castle*

Bat Luigi: MARIO! NO!! *flies after him.*

Batula turns to Mario and swoops down at him.

Mario: Whoa! *Jumps away from Batula*

Bat Luigi: Oh I gotta stop him before he drains my brother's blood!! O_o; But... Say, I got it! *transforms into Vampire Luigi* Blaaah!!

Mario: AYE!! Luigi?!

Vampire Luigi: *hypnotises Mario* Look into my eyes, brother!! You are under my power!

*Mario is hypnotized.*

Vampire Luigi: I want to suck your blood!! Blah!! Now-a-stay still.. *Tries to.. but grabs him.*

Bosco: AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!! *pulls out a pitchfork* Lay off the red plumber you sick human pedophile!!

Vampire Luigi: Wuhh?! *becomes Bat Luigi and takes Mario away*

*Bosco chases Bat Luigi.*

Count Batula turns to Pac-Man and licks his lips.

Pac-Man: *angry.* I'm not afraid of you. *Punches Batula.*

*In Batula's bedroom.*

Bosco: Look you stupid rat! Give me the plumber, or this house will come tumblin' down!!

Bat Luigi: You got to listen for a reason!!

Bosco: I know. You suck blood! Admit it!

*Bat Luigi becomes Vampire Luigi. But he whips out another garlic and eats it, becomign normal.*

Bosco: WAH??!

Luigi: See! I'm not a vampire at all! It was the Vampire Mushroom!

Bosco: WHAT THE HELL?? I don't get it!!

*Mario gets up and sees Luigi.*

Luigi: Mario!

Mario: WHOA!! *backs away* Stop-a-suckin' my blood!

Luigi: No, bro! It's really me! Luigi.

Mario: ...*sighs in relief* For a moment there, I was hallucinating..

Luigi: I gotta get you two out of here before the count will get us.

Count Batula tries to bite Pac-Man.

*Pac-Man shoves a garlic on Batula's fangs.*

Batula screams and rolls on the floor in pain.

*Pac-Man butt-bounces on Batula.*

*The Mario Bros. and Bosco sneaks away.*

Batula flies off.

Pac-Man: Man, that bat is such a wuss...

*Mario Bros. and Bosco comes out.*

Pac-Man: O_o? Luigi?

Luigi: Uh... I'll explain later.

Zombies start barging into the castle.

Luigi: I FORGOT!! THE ZOMBIES ARE OUTSIDE!!

The zombies hiss at the group.

Mario: Luigi? Shall we do this, the Mario Bros way?

Luigi: Oh yeah!

*Mario and Luigi are using a Bros. technique, the Cyclone Bros. to attack the zombies. Unfortunately for Bosco, he was grabbed by the zombies.*

Bosco: HELP ME!!

The zombies start biting Bosco.

Bosco: You're not good at saving people, are ya?!

Mario: *Star spins the zombies* I'm good at saving. You could've yelled a little louder.

Bosco: Hey, just use the weapon I gave ya.

Mario: It wouldn't work on them!!

Bosco: But it works! Trust me! Trust me!

*Mario pulls out his super soaker and blasts them away*

Luigi: Mario!! *throws the Fire Flower at Mario, making him Fire Mario.*

Mario: Sigh.. *throws the super soaker away and burns the zombies.*

The zombies run around in panic.

Bosco: Thanks, boy.

Luigi: Okie dokie, time to go-ie..

Bosco: YOUR RHYME SUCKED!!

*Mario Bros. Pac-Man, and Bosco leaves the castle. They are walking by Gregg.*

Luigi: Hello Mr. Scary Grim Reaper. Nice night, isn't it?

Gregg: Shut up before I kill you and make your friends eat your corpse.

Bosco: AHH!! OK! Time's up! Stay away from the bone! *pushes himself, Mario Bros. and Pac-Man out of the topic.*