Castlevania (Castlevania)

A scythe appears out of nowhere in front of Alex and swings around. Death appears and grabs hold of the scythe.

Death: Ahh, welcome! You must be... Alexander von Koopa.

...

Julius ducks and swings Vampire Killer at Dopple Julius's legs.

Alex: How do you know? Are you a stalker?
Abaddon just watches this.

...

Dopple Julius leaps over the Vampire Killer and whips Julius in mid-air.

Julius back dashes and throws an axe at Dopple Julius.

...

Death: I am the physical manifestation of death in this realm. I know everything about anyone who has ever existed in this realm for that is my job.

Dopple Julius whips the axe out of the sky.

...

Alex: Wait a second... I can't die yet! It's not in the script!
Alex pulls a book twenty times larger than the entire Encyclopedia Britannica out of his shell.

Death: Now now, I never said you would die... yet.

...

Julius throws a bottle of Holy Water where the Doppleganger will land.

Alex: Well, if you're the grim reaper, you aren't going to come up and offer me cookies.

...

The Doppleganger jumps in the air (what?) and lands in front of Julius, who it whips once more.

Julius is sent back a few inches but quickly retaliates by whiping the Dopple Julius.

...

Death: True, since I am considered an omen to most if not all mortals... but you, Alex, you are no ordinary mortal. I can sense your power, flowing through you like a river.

The Dopple Julius whips Julius some more.

...

Alex: You know, speaking of flowing, I do kind of have to use the restroom.

Julius does the same, making the fight look more like a sissy slap fight than a real fight. Yoko just watches, waiting for the fight to end.

Julius: A little help would be nice!

Yoko: Oh, right.

Yoko casts a thunder spell at the Dopple Julius.

...

Death rubs his skull and sighs.

Death: If it's a restroom you are looking for then I'm afraid to tell you that there are no restrooms here or anywhere in the castle for the caste's residence do not require the mortal needs to expel their waste.

Dopple Julius turns to Yoko, then changes form into Dopple Yoko and zaps her with a thunderbolt.

...

Alex: What am I supposed to do? Go in the moat?

Death: ... Well... I suppose you could use the moat... if you can avoid the Mermen.

...

Yoko gets zapped since she can't do anything to avoid the attack. Julius runs up behind the Dopple Yoko and whips her on the back.

Alex bolts out of the castle, goes to the moat, and... somehow does business, even though he can't take off his shell.

...

Dopple Yoko quickly runs behind Yoko and tries blasting her with a fireball.

Death: Mortals...

...

Yoko surrounds herself with an ice shield. After the fire spell hits, the ice shield breaks and shoots out at the Dopple Yoko. Julius chases after the boat and Yokos.

Dopple Yoko concentrates and a whirlwind gathers around her.

...

A Merman leaps at Alex, who quickly cuts it to ribbons with Bane. He finishes doing his business and goes back inside, chunks of Merman flesh on Bane.

???: What is all this ruckus?

Death turns and sees Count Olrox leaning against a marble doorway.

Death: Olrox, what are you doing here? You're supposed to be in your living quarters.

Olrox: How am I supposed to live in my quarters with all this ruckus?

Olrox walks up to Alex and bends down to see him eye to eye.

Olrox: ... And who or what is this... thing?

...

Julius throws a cross at the Dopple Yoko, hitting her in the back of the head.

Alex: Hey, you aren't so pretty yourself. In fact, I think you're uglier then that insect dude.
Abaddon: Obviously.
Alex: That wasn't a compliment.

...

The cross gets sucked into the whirlwind and spins around rapidly, hitting Yoko again and again.

Olrox: Why did you even let this being onto the castle grounds, Death?

Death: ... So he can rest a while and feel a bit at home. After all, he is our guest.

Olrox looks at Death with a confused look.

...

Yoko screams in pain for every time she gets hit. Julius tries to whip the Dopple Yoko.

The strength of the whirlwind starts to pull Julius in.

...

Alex looks equally confused. Persephone turns to Death.
Persephone: You mean I have to clean up after that THING?

Death: Yes. Now then, Persephone, take him to an available living quarter and make him feel comfortable.

...

Julius summons a giant cross on the Dopple Yoko, breaking free of the whirlwind.

Persephone, grumbling, grabs Alex by the arm and drags him off to "suitable living quarters"... which in this case is the basement.

...

Dopple Yoko turns back to Dopple Julius and leaps towards Julius, whip at the ready.

Olrox: What are you planning?

Death: Are you that blind!? Could you not sence the power in that creature!? With him, we would only need to sacrifice him and the dark lord would be reborn once more!

Olrox: You do realize the sacrifice would have to be a willing soul, correct?

Death: It shouldn't be that difficult to trick him what with him being so ignorant and naive.

...

Julius readies his whip as well.

Abaddon: Honestly, I'm not going to miss him. He insulted my looks, and for that, he should either die or serve the count for eternity, THEN die.

...

Dopple Julius quickly whips Julius. Meanwhile, Alex looks around the basement and notices a sarcophagus leaned against the wall as if to cover something.

Death: I will see to it that Shaft prepares the sacrificial altar.

Death swings his scythe and disappears.

Olrox leisurelly strolls out of the room and back to his quarters in the center of the castle.

...

Julius deflects the attacks with his whip.

Dopple Julius dangles his whip in front of him and spins it around quickly.

...

Alex starts moving the sarcophagus out of the way.

Julius barely manages to keep up with the attacks. He kicks the Dopple Julius in the stomach, sending him back a few inches.

...

Death appears in Dracula's throne room.

Death: Shaft! Show yourself!

Shaft appears but not completely.

Shaft: You called master Death?

Death: It seems that you will need to prepare the sacrifice earlier than expected.

Shaft: Master?

Death: We have the sacrifice required to summon the lord.

Shaft: But master, the sacrifice requires more than one willing soul.

Death: We won't need anymore sacrifices after we use this one. His power should be enough. Now prepare the sacrifice!

Shaft: ... Of course.

The Shaft silhouette vanishes.