CDM Arena (Celebrity Death Match)

Several TV cameras focus on Nick and Johnny.

Johnny: Welcome to Celbrity Death Match, where the night is young and the blood is freshly spilt! I'm Johnny Gomez...

Nick: And I'm Nick Diamond!

Johnny: We promise that tonight will be special night! In our only mach for tonight, we have the craziest police men the world has ever seen going against a real live golem!

Nick: That's right Johnny! It's Sam and Max, Freelance Police, against... uh... oh, we never did get the golem's name!

Johnny: Already on it Nick! *Searches the CCRPG Registration List on the internet.* The golem's name is Erix, he has no gender, but talks with a male voice. Nearly nothing can penetrate his rock hard body, but he is also very slow.

Nick: Well Johnny, it looks like this match is pretty one sided.

Johnny: I wouldn't count Sam and Max out just yet. Whenever the situation gets tough, those two somehow always manage to get out of it. Let's go to Tally Wong who's on the ring with Erix. Take it away Tally!

Tally: *Cheery* Nick, *Grumpy* Johnny, I'm here with the golem known as Erix who went straight to the arena as soon as he, or it, got here! *To Erix.* Tell me, what is your purpose for fightning in CDM? *Does her best to hold the microphone to Erix's general mouth area.*

Erix: Pllllllllllllooooooooooooooooothoooooooooooooooooooooolesssssssssssssssss.

OOC: It's hard to write dialouge for someone who speaks slowly and carries a big fist.

Max: I'm just gonna say that he wants a fair fight.

Sam: And looks like a certain somebody is getting the Obvious Award.

Max: Ooh! Who could it be?

Tally: Well, uh... Sam and Max, it's said that you two have had a fair share of weird cases. Which one has to be the weirdest?

Alex and Dr. Y enter the topic.

Sam: Well, to be honest, Tally, I have to say the weirdest of them all is trying to free the rats from being devoured by gigantic cockroaches.

Max: Also, we stopped the devastating prophecy at the Bermuda Triangle. Those were the best days of our lives!

Tally: Interesting... So what's your motivations for fighting?

Max: Any kind, like happiness, depression, and anger. We'll do all of them! Unlike the big rocky-fella there, who doesn't have any emotions towards puppies, nature, and even his mother.

Tally: Ooo, harsh words! I can already tell this going to be more than an interesting fight! This is Tally Wong!

Johnny: Thank you for that interview Tally. Now we go to ringside with Mills Lane for the rules.

Mills Lane steps up onto the ring.

Mills: Alright you three, the first rule to Death Match: there are no rules, so everything is fair game! *To Sam and Max.* But I don't want to hear any unnecessary remarks from you two, *To Erix.* and you, I don't want you to kill these two in one move! We need to make this interesting! NOW LET'S GET IT ON!!!

Mills Lane runs off the ring and a bell is rung.

Sam: Sic'em little buddy!

Max: *chest banging* YAADAAAABAAA!! *lunges towards to Erix and start gnawing his arm.*

Erix just stands there, not feeling a thing.

Sam: That golem isn't feeling any pain, Max. The only thing that can faze him if we have any explosives.

Max: Or a pickaxe. You got one with ya?

Sam: Sure do! *whips out a pickaxe.* Now this may sting a little. *Slams his pickaxe on Erix.*

The pickaxe shatters on contact with Erix, who punches Sam across the ring... with one punch.

*Sam ends up in the trashcan.*

Sam: Boy, he's a big guy. A big strong guy I might add. *gets back to the ring.* We need to find something that can damage him.

Max: Such as a bucket of water? I saw one from a cartoon show once, and it was effected enough to defeat a rock snake.

Erix keeps standing there, not quite getting the purpose of being in a fighting ring.

Sam: Looks like he's just bored and doesn't care if he's hurt.

Max: Honestly, he has no emotions at all.

Sam: For once, you're right Max. If he doesn't have any emotions, then he doesn't care if we try to blow him apart. Say Max, you got the box of dynamite?

Max: Sure do! *whips out a box of dynamite.* Want me to shove it up his ass?

Sam: *chuckles* You crack me up little buddy!

*Max tapes the box of dynamite on Erix's chest.*

Max: FIRE IN THE HOLE!!

*The box of dynamite explodes.*

This kind of tickles Erix, who once again punches Sam. And Max as well. As before, this hurts a lot and sends the two flying.

*And ends up in the same trash can.*

Sam: I don't know about you, but I'm starting to think that golem wants to humiliate us in public television.

Max: And this no way to treat a cartoon celebrity!..Or comic books.. or video games...

Sam: And he's not even a celebrity.

Max: The golem is not a celebrity?! *Jumps back to the ring and whips out a microphone.* THAT GOLEM IS NOT A CELEBRITY! HE'S JUST A BIG PILE OF GRAVEL!!

Marilyn Manson: Neither are Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster, or you, yet you seem to be in the ring without any problems.

Sam: Yeah that's true. Do you know how to defeat that monster?

Marilyn Manson: No. But rest assured I could.

Sam: How?

Marilyn Manson: I just said I don't know, idiot.

Mills: *To Sam.* Hey, no asking the audience for help! NOW LET'S GET IT BACK ON!!!

Erix's fists extend from his body, grab Sam and Max, and drag them back into the arena before beating them against the ground.